What I Don’t Buy
And why that matters more than ever.

I’m 37.
And I’ve never worn makeup.
Never applied creams or oils.
Never used deodorant, perfume, shampoo, or sunscreen.
I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t vape.
And I rarely buy clothes — and when I do, they’re secondhand. Not wrapped in plastic or marketing.

This isn’t new. This isn’t a phase. This is how I’ve always lived.
Not out of neglect. Not because I don’t care. But because I’ve never felt the need to cover myself up — or buy into a world that tells women they’re not good enough without enhancement.

I wasn’t raised by magazines.
I was raised by wind.
By the smell of trees, not fragrances.
By muddy trails, not shopping malls.

The average woman my age in the West spends €175 to €540 every month on cosmetics, alcohol, clothing, and smoking or vaping.
I spend €0 to €20 — if that.
That’s up to €6,000 a year that I don’t hand over to industries that profit from insecurity, addiction, pollution, and distraction.

But this isn’t about pride. It’s not about being “better.”
It’s about freedom.
The kind you feel in your skin when it’s untouched and alive.
The kind that doesn’t smell like lavender or “clean cotton,” but like sun and sweat and rain.
The kind that doesn’t come from a bottle, or a brand, or a transaction.

I don’t need a shelf full of products to feel worthy.
I just need to feel the ground beneath my feet.
To walk through the world as I am — real, raw, rooted.
To know that I’m not polluting the earth just to feel human.

It’s not that I gave up on the system.
It never had a hold on me.

And still, even now, living in a space that isn’t mine, surrounded by concrete, overstimulated and worn down —
I keep choosing this.
This quiet protest.
This radical form of self-trust.
This refusal to buy my place in a world I don’t believe in.

Because beauty isn’t in the bottle.
It’s in the breath you don’t owe to anyone.
In the earth you walk gently on.
In the choice to need less and feel more.

This is my way of saying:
You don’t have to participate to belong.