Four people, two countries and a remarkably similar story

Lena and I have known each other for sixteen years. Over those years, despite living in different countries, we discovered that our lives have followed surprisingly similar paths. Different countries, different languages, different cultures and different circumstances, yet many of the same struggles. We watched each other grow up, endure difficult periods, make painful choices and continue searching for lives that felt true to who we are.

What has always stood out to us, is that neither of us became bitter. Despite everything, we remained people who care deeply. About animals and nature, about kindness and about creating a life that causes as little harm as possible. In a world that often seems to reward the opposite, that has not always been easy.

For years, all four of us have been trying to build lives that align with who we truly are, rather than who we are expected to be. We are not chasing wealth, status or luxury. What we are searching for is surprisingly simple: a safe place to live, access to nature, meaningful work, the freedom to care, the freedom to create and enough stability to stop surviving and finally start living.

Lena and Stefan

Lena and her partner were born and raised in a country in southern Europe. For as long as I have known Lena, her life has revolved around animals, nature and staying true to her values. But her life did not begin with the kind of stability many people take for granted. For much of her childhood and early adulthood, she did not even have a room of her own and spent the night at her parent’s room or on a couch instead. While others were able to focus on building a future, pursuing education, saving money or becoming independent, she was often trying to create a foundation that many people receive automatically. Yet she never lost her ability to care for others.

Over the years she has rescued countless animals, cared for injured wildlife, developed practical veterinary skills, treated wounds, administered medication and become someone people turn to when their animals need help. Many people trust her judgement when their furbabies are sick. What began as helping animals in need gradually became a way of life.

Today, Lena and her partner share their apartment with seven rescued cats in a big city. That was never the plan. But whenever an animal had nowhere else to go, they chose responsibility over convenience. Every major decision they make has to take those animals into account.

Ironically, the very compassion that makes Lena so good with animals, has also closed certain doors for her. Becoming a veterinarian seems like an obvious path on paper, yet the reality of veterinary education often conflicts with her values. Practices involving animal experimentation, dissections and other aspects of training make a career that appears ideal emotionally difficult to pursue.

Alongside animals, art has always been a constant presence in her life. Drawing and painting have been among the ways she understands and processes the world since childhood. Despite financial pressure to choose a safer path, she continued creating. Her talent led to mural projects, commissions and other artistic opportunities, but like many artists she has learned how difficult it is to turn creativity into a stable income. Her art is not simply a hobby.
Just like her work with animals, it is a way of bringing beauty, meaning and care into the world around her.
So to support herself financially, Lena works in a field that offers more financial stability than art or animal care. She is grateful to have work, but it is not the work she once imagined doing with her life. Like so many people, she has had to choose stability over passion simply because there were few realistic alternatives.

As a woman following an unconventional path, Lena has often felt that her talents, ambitions and contributions were not taken as seriously as they deserved. There have been countless moments where people directed their questions to her partner, even when she was the one with the knowledge, experience or answers. Moments where she felt overlooked, simply because she was standing next to a man. Experiences like these may seem small in isolation, but over time they create the feeling of constantly having to prove yourself before being taken seriously.

Despite that, she has continued to trust her own judgement, develop her skills and build a life based on her values rather than other people’s expectations. On top of that, she chose a vegan lifestyle in a country where that is still relatively uncommon and often misunderstood. For years she has remained true to her convictions even when doing so made life more difficult.

Nature is where Lena feels most at home. Yet even that comes with obstacles. The truly wild places she loves are often hours away. The roads leading to them are not only long, but also notorious for dangerous driving and poor enforcement of traffic laws. What should be a relaxing day in nature often requires enormous amounts of time, energy and anxiety before the walk has even begun.

For Lena and her partner, leaving Bulgaria is not about chasing a fantasy, but it is about trying to find a place where their values, talents and way of life can flourish. A place where compassion, creativity and care for animals do not constantly feel like swimming against the current. So they are not trying to escape challenges, but rather, they are trying to build a life where they can grow instead of constantly fighting to stay afloat.

Nat and Mart

Nat and Mart live in a small room in a city in the Netherlands. At its heart, their story is about something that sounds simple to most people: building a home together. For them, it never was.

Long before the current housing crisis became a national issue, circumstances repeatedly stood in the way of creating an independent life together. Things many couples take for granted (living together, building daily routines, creating stability and simply sharing a life) always seemed just beyond reach.

Years of complicated family circumstances, instability and limited opportunities forced them to adapt again and again. That ongoing uncertainty came with consequences. Mart eventually lost his own home, making it even harder to build an independent future together. As the housing market became increasingly difficult, the remaining realistic opportunities to start over, disappeared as well.

At one point, it finally seemed as though there might be a way forward. Their first old home on wheels gave them something they had been missing for years: freedom, independence and a sense of home. For two years, they carefully built a life that felt more aligned with who they were. Then that chapter came to an abrupt end and they lost everything they had worked so hard to create.

Since 2020, they have been living together in Nat’s childhood bedroom. For eighteen months, they even lived in a small tent in the paved back garden, because it offered more peace than being indoors. But the room itself is not the hardest part of their situation. The hardest part is everything around it. Living in an environment with different needs, different priorities and a completely different energy. The lack of privacy. The constant noise and interruptions. An environment that continuously demands energy while offering very little opportunity to recover.

For people who are highly sensitive to overstimulation, this has a profound impact on daily life. Things that seem simple to others, can become unexpectedly difficult: leaving the house, planning a day, recovering from stress or simply finding peace. For Nat, PMDD, migraine and hyperosmia continuously reinforce one another. Much of her energy goes not into living, but into managing circumstances.

Nature is one of the few places where her nervous system feels a bit more at ease. The only place where body and mind stop working against each other. Yet even reaching those places is often a challenge. Financial limitations, transportation issues, crowds, overstimulation and their current living situation can turn a simple walk into a logistical undertaking. The hike itself is never the problem. The problem is everything that is required to get there and make it back to my mother’s house.

For years, Nat and Mart have been working toward a different future.
A future with more peace, independence, nature and more room to recover, create and contribute. That dream eventually led them to purchase another old camper in 2023. Not as a project or a romantic adventure, but as a practical attempt to build a life that better supports their wellbeing.

Since then, they have spent years repairing and restoring it many early mornings. They don’t doubt the dream, but every step requires money, time and energy that are often in short supply. In three years, they have only been able to take the camper out TWICE for a brief test adventure, before mechanical problems abruptly ended the attempt shortly after leaving. So three years later, the camper is still parked at this stage unit. They worked as hard as they could, but every step forward depends on circumstances, finances, health and opportunities that are constantly shifting.

They keep going, because they believe another life is possible. A life where not all of their energy is spent enduring circumstances. A life where building finally becomes more important than rebuilding.

What Connects Us

On the surface, our lives may appear very different, but beneath that surface runs a remarkably similar thread. All four of us have spent years trying to build lives that fit who we are. We care about animals and nature. We try to do what feels right, even when it is not the easiest path. We believe success has more to do with meaning, freedom, health and connection than status or possessions.

And because of that, we often find ourselves at odds with systems built around very different priorities. Many people can follow an existing path: education, work, home and retirement. For most, that path works. For some, it does not. We belong to the latter group. Not because we reject responsibility or because we are unwilling to work. But because we are trying to build lives that align with our values without losing ourselves in the process. That takes time. It takes courage and sometimes, it requires help.

Why We Are Sharing Our Story

We are sharing our story because we know there are more people like us. People who feel more at home in a forest than in a shopping centre. People who care deeply about animals. People who create. People who dream of contributing something meaningful to the world. People who have spent years trying to build a life that feels more like living than surviving.
We do not expect others to solve our problems. We keep working, planning, saving, repairing, learning and moving forward, but we also know that a helping hand at the right moment can change the course of a life.

For Lena and her partner, that could mean finally having the opportunity to build a future in a country where they feel safer and where their talents, creativity and compassion can truly flourish.
For Nat and Mart, it could mean finally taking the practical steps needed to regain independence, mobility and a stable foundation for the future.
For all four of us, it means having the chance to spend less energy surviving and more energy creating, contributing, caring and living.

If our story resonates with you, thank you for taking the time to read it. Sometimes being seen and understood is already a gift.